Friday, September 28, 2007


Name: clogwog

  • Pathetic attention seeker
  • Mostly uses mail to news gateways for anonymity
  • Frequently nymshifts
  • Habitual liar
  • Homophobic
  • Possibly Dutch
[Thanks to xxxxxxx for most of the clogwog details]

Some of its nyms:

Clogwog, Peer Geilzeever, Nicodemus Kwaadenkloot, Gozewienus Smegmasmuller, Arsene van Tiethuysen, Deodatus Kuttenvanger, Olivier Anusjager, Quirinus Pukkelpenis, Gradus Kanusmans, Berend van het Aarshouweel, Driekus van 't Lullenhof, Derk den Klotsoksel, Hentje Kotskameel, Arie Drollenboer, Wullum Droogkloot, Peer van der Berigheid, Arend Keuvelklier, Marinus Pielrukker, Karel Klootendraaier, Dingeman Sneerbakkus, Kobus Binnenaars, Manus Simpelcont, Jodocus Uytbuicker, Arsene den Rode-Apenkontjager, Desederius van der Keutelenhof, Querinus van der Tiethuyzen, Gezinus den Sluitspierbeul, Dingeman Sneerbakkus.

Friday, August 24, 2007


Name: waterskidoo

  • Attempts to make well reasoned sounding posts - mostly fails
  • The style has a suspicious smell of the flatfish troll when on its meds
  • Sockpuppet
  • Smells even more like flatfish:
Message-ID: fasebm$m1g$

Monday, February 26, 2007


Name: Lintard

  • Pathetic troll

Thursday, February 22, 2007

Oliver Wong

Name: Oliver Wong

  • Microsoft apologist
  • Seriously lacking in ethical values
  • Deservedly nicknamed Oliver Wrong
[I would like to add a link to where Wrong showed his utter lack of ethical values]

Saturday, February 10, 2007


Name: NoNamer (

  • Microsoft shill
  • Habitual liar
  • Utterly pathetic

Friday, February 2, 2007

Dr. GroundAxe

Name: Dr. GroundAxe

  • Pathetic Microsoft apologist

Monday, January 29, 2007


Name: cc

  • Microsoft apologist
  • Pretends to be OS neutral - fails miserably

Sunday, January 28, 2007


Name: OK

  • Microsoft apologist
  • Pathological liar

Mike Cox

Name: Mike Cox

  • Attention seeker
  • Thinks he's a Linux/Unix systems programmer (he isn't - see below)
  • Even dumber than the average Windows troll

The 'home'command takes you to your home directory if you've been wandering far, and don't want to type so much. Just type "home" at the shell, and you're immediatly transported to /home/yourusername/

Read the thread and enjoy seeing an imbecile being torn to shreds. Amazingly he came back for more with a version 2 of his home command.

Saturday, January 27, 2007

Scott Nudds

Name: Scott Nudds (aka VistaKing)

  • Microsoft Shill
  • Scott Nudds also trolls on it seems
  • Often nym shifts - badly (email address BushIsATraitor@hotmail is the give away)
  • Is obsessed with excrement when describing Linux and Linux advocates


Name: snit

  • MAC troll
  • Cross posts to maximize newsgroup disruption
  • Despised by many on COLA and COMA (comp.os.mac.advocacy)
  • Proves the saying 'those that can do, those that can't teach'
  • Idiot

John Bailo

Name: John Bailo

  • Nym shifter - used to nym shift almost by the hour - seems to be reformed
  • Attention seeker - will go into a tantrum if ignored
  • Appears lucid on occasions (perhaps after medication)
  • Frequently posts completely off-topic articles
  • Frequently cross posts to get more attention

Alexander Terekhov

Name: Alexander Terekhov

  • Simple minded windows troll
  • Upset that Roy Schestowitz doesn't include him in his troll list
  • Did I mention he is simple?

Nedd Ludd

Name: Nedd Ludd

  • Microsoft apologist
  • Habitual liar
  • Homophobe
  • Immature (see below)

From: "Nedd Ludd"
Newsgroups: comp.os.linux.advocacy
Subject: Linux question
X-Newsreader: Microsoft Outlook Express 6.00.2800.1807

Is anyone in this news group getting laid tonight?

What are the chances of meeting a girl while singing praises about Linux on

Have fun luzer.

Black Dragon

Name: Black Dragon (aka: colastats)

  • Thinks using 'X-No-Archive: yes' protects him from future usenet searches
  • Trolls for the sake of it. Seems to get a kick out of pissing people off
  • Posts infantile one-liners trying to look smart / witty - fails


Name: wjbell (Warren J. Bell)

  • Proven plagiarizer
  • Habitual liar
  • Newsgroup spammer
  • Asshole


Name: "Some nym"

  • Unimaginative, repetitively boring Microsoft apologist
  • Thinks nym shifting by changing "Some nym" avoids kill files
  • Habitual liar
  • Very stupid

Tim Smith

Name: Tim Smith

  • Microsoft apologist
  • Funkenbusch wannabee - fails badly
  • An incredible bore
  • An incredible bore - oops I've said that already, no more to be said

Hadron Quark

Name: Hadron Quark (aka: Hadron, Damian O'Leary, Hans Schneider)

  • Homophobe (another closet gay wintroll?)
  • Often changes previous posters text in followups (see below)
  • Microsoft apologist
  • Habitual liar
  • Posts messages which are blatant lies pretending they were written by Linux advocates.
  • Sets Organization header pretending to work at CERN, IBM, etc
  • Doesn't understand the value of telnet client as a simple network debugging tool. Thinks using telnet always means sending a username and password in clear text. Truly ignorant of TCP/IP.
  • Troll puppet
  • Gets upset when anyone includes their qualification in their .sig. This along with his pretence of working at CERN and IBM implies, IMHO, an inferiority complex. Probably a drop out who bears a grudge towards those who have achieved what Hadron couldn't.
  • Exhibits serious reading comprehension difficulties
  • Quark is too stupid to understand when the point above is explained to him over and over again
  • In case you missed it, he is just stupid. No cure. So sad
  • Recent nyms: Ubuntu King, Steve Townsend
The following post sums up the trolls lack of intelligence most concisely:

From: Homer
Newsgroups: comp.os.linux.advocacy,
Message-ID: hedd26-tu7.ln1@sky.matrix

Let me introduce Hadron Quark, affectionately known as COLA's Resident
"Expert" on Everything - Ever ®, who is without exception the most stupid
person I have ever encountered in my entire life.

And I don't say this as some offhand insult, it is a simple statement of
fact. He makes Dubya Bush look like a Nobel Prize-winning mathematician
by comparison, so I'm afraid you'd be wasting your time simplifying the
truth for his benefit.

You could liquidise the truth with a pound of bananas, and spoon-feed it
to Hadron whilst carefully wiping the dribbles from his mouth, and he'd
still totally fail to understand.


The following example is a case of where the the filthy troll changes the quoted text its replying to:

Original text:


So, according to you, I'm a roy lapdog who follows him around like a slave...
Agreeing with everything he ever says..

Hadron's quote:


> I'm a roy lapdog who follows him around like a slave...
> Agreeing with everything he ever says..

More quotes:

Was there a more H[y]pocritical and dishonest, snivelling swine as this Homo? I can not think of one.
comp.os.linux.advocacy - Thu, 07 Feb 2008 21:44:02 +0100
Message-ID: fofqii$vl9$

Surely you are not comparing the non-existent Linux (at that time) with 98?
comp.os.linux.advocacy - Thu, 16 Aug 2007

"Anything said in COLA is a crock of shit."
Hadron Quark, Tuesday 03 Jul 2007 - alt.os.linux.ubuntu

LOL Indeed. Of course I troll sometimes. I never denied it. One has to when dealing with loonies like Willy Boaster and his amazing killfiles.

It does appear that Chris Arsestrom is attached to Roy's sphincter via
his tongue. Quite amazing as he used to be quite a balanced poster. Now
its just, as you say, snip and hide and giggle while not even bothering
to argue the FACTS presented to him. He rarely, if ever, reads the posts
he replies to. It's almost as if Roy kicks him up his arse and says "go
get Liarmutt, fetch!".
Newsgroups: comp.os.linux.advocacy
Message-ID: ghoqsi$4j4$

Erik Funkenbusch

Name: Erik 'the weasel' Funkenbusch

  • Microsoft apologist with no peer
  • Spreads FUD about Linux, OSS & GPL (did the same when OS/2 was a threat to Microsoft)
  • Habitual liar
  • When caught lying runs away
  • Will resort to unethical means to denigrate Linux advocates - always fails
  • Funkenbusch is utterly devoid of ethical values
  • Known to cross post to other Linux newsgroups in a futile attempt at causing more disruption
  • Obsessed with Roy Schestowitz
  • Racist (see below regarding 419 scams)
Unanswered FUD from Erik:
  • Where does NTFS store its journal?
  • How did the Morris worm spread by email?
  • What about using MS TT fonts on Linux, why have they to be *only*
    used in Windows?
  • Can he provide evidence for plenty of examples of competing ISO
  • What about the "dozens of root exploits per month in linux" he
    claimed, & he was then found to be making it all up?
  • What was the master plan Erik had when he spammed COLA with incipient replies to Roy Schestowitz's [News] posts?
Want to see Erik's ignorance about Linux? Follow this thread:


Security is one of those funny things. You can talk about being "more" secure, but there's no such thing. A vulnerability is a vulnerability, and even one makes you just as insecure as anyone else. Security is a binary condition, either you are or you aren't.

I still stand by my argument that the morris worm spread through email because it spread through sendmail, and email program.

Newsgroups: comp.os.linux.advocacy
Message-ID: <>

Much like Linux vendors have a conflict of interest in that they subsist entirely on support contracts, and have no financial incentive to make problem free software.

Newsgroups: comp.os.linux.advocacy
Message-ID: <>

I don't consider anything handed down from above as "open source", whether or not it's released using an open source license.

Newsgroups: comp.os.linux.advocacy

Here's a reason why EVERYONE should be running scared.

1) Millions of NIGERIAN children with free PC's. There's a reason most of the 419 scams come out of nigeria, and now having millions of people with computers to run such scams will only make things worse.

Newsgroups: comp.os.linux.advocacy
Message-ID: <1ab6759hbc4j3$>

[here's a bit of inanity regarding OpenOffice downloads]

Whether or not that's true, it could mean 1/2 a billion installs that got installed, then trashed righ away when they didn't like it.

Or, and I think this is more likely, I think there are legions of people running scripts out there to download the files over and over to stack the download count.

Newsgroups: comp.os.linux.advocacy,comp.text.pdf


Name: amicus_curious (aka billwg, Bill Weisgerber)

  • Microsoft apologist
  • Habitual liar
  • Racist
  • Thinks 'LOL!!!' makes his puerile posts credible
  • Repeats the same lies even when proven to be lies
  • Windbag


Name: Larry Qualig (former Microsoft employee)

  • Microsoft apologist
  • Cannot read usenet headers
  • Habitual liar
  • Makes claims of plagiarism yet when asked to provide proof fails to do so.


Name: dfs (affectionately known as DooFus / DuFus)

  • Racist
  • Habitual liar
  • Microsoft apologist

If it weren't for Windows, you wouldn't be posting anything right now.

Nothing wrong with laughing like an idiot. I do it all the time.

Message-ID: bGyMe.6989$F_7.4029@fe06.lga


Name: flatfish+++ (in real life Gary Stewart)

  • Nym shifting (see below)
  • Roy Schestowitz stalker
  • Self confessed thief and proud of it
  • Homophobic
  • Racist
  • Habitual liar
  • Frequently cross posts replies to other non-Linux related newsgroups
  • Frequently cross posts articles originally not posted to COLA
  • Known to post 7x24 when off its meds

The flatfish troll nyms shifts an extraordinary amount often using the nyms as sock puppets. Here is a list of some of the nyms the flatfish troll has used (NB: flatfish will often use the names of other posters as nyms):

1.ball.willy, Abbie Diaz, achmed.jones, Aftab Singh, alan.yunick, Alicia Hunt, Allen Cusimano, Allie Perkins, allison_hunt1969, Allison Juergans, Amy Fisher, Ana Thema, andyschipowitz, Anna Banger, anonymous, Archie, Archie Moss Bunker, Archie Watermann, arkady.duntov, Attila, baaaaabaaaaboooeee, Baba Booey, Babcock Johnson, babcock.latreen, Babu Singh, ball.cock.the.plumber, banjo.boy69, Bart, Bart Bushey,, Bill Softie, Bill Thomson, Billy, Billy , BingoBongo, bison, Bjarne Jensen, bjornstad8800, BklynBoy, Bob Sickle, bones4jones, bonobo magilla, Boyce Mabri, Brother John, BSEE, Bunsen Burner, Buster, c.baumstumpff, CBFalconer, Charles C.DuPlessey, Charles Griggs, Charles LeGrand, Charlie, Choppers McGee, Chris Thomas, Christine Abernathy, Claire Lynn, Clippy, Clock King, collie4roy, Collie Entragion, Colon Singh, common cold, compton.plaines_kid, Connie Hines, Corrie, Corrie Titlaand, corry.lebeu, Cory Dyvik, Crystal Meth Rulez, Curtis Wilson, cymon.says, Damian O'Leary, Damian O'Leary , Dana Bush, Danny Kwong, Darren Whisper, dbx_boy, Deadpenguin, Debbie, detective48, Devon Dawson, dismoqualifetch, Doctor Smith, Donald, donna.bunting_tv, Donn Carlsbad, dont.pullout, doris.gets.her.oates, Doug Richardson, Dragon.Boy, Dr.Long John Jones, dy.sector, echo.valley_26809, Eddy Carter, Elliot Zimmermann, Elwin Winters, Emmanuel Arias, Erin Mungan, eunuch.roy, Eyeball, Fanny Crackwell, Fawn Lebowitz, flatfish+++, foamy, FoxyKnoxy, frank boson, Franz Klammer, Fred Simmons, gabriele howorth, Gary M. Stewart, Gary Stewart, GayClod, George Barca, George Cotton, George Littlefield, Gilbert, Gilbert Goiter, Gilbert Hochaim, gilligan, goldfarb44, gooseborg, Graham, Greg Finnigan, Greg Laplante, Hamilcar Barca, Hank, Hans Kimm, Hans Lister, Hans Tomlinson, Harry Hilton, Harvey Fogel, Heather, Heather69, heather.banger, Heather Trax, Heddy Seafield, Heidi van Wong, helmut.ginter, hepcat, high_pain_humper, Hugh Himless, hymen.the.jew, Ishmeal Hafizi, itchy balls, IvanaB, Ivan Mctavish, Jason, jeff.smiley, Jeff Szarka, jjwassermann, Joe Josephson, John, John Fuhrer, John King, johnnyscotrun, John Shelton, John Smith,, Jorge Jorgensen, jorge_shillingford, Jose Lopez, Juan, juke_joint, kaptain kaput, Karel Olish, karen.bullfinch, Karen Hill, Karen Watson , Karla Snodgress, kathy_krantz, Kaylie Solomon, Kendra, Ken Johnson, Kenneth Downs, Kenny Dugan, Kent Dorfman, Kevin Wilcox, Kimba, Kim Coinop, Kinglen Wang, Kristen, kumba killington, Kurt Janker, Kyle Cadet, lafferty6, Laura Shillingford, L Didio, Leaking Onion, Le Farter, Leo Diaz, Leroy Jefferson, Les Cramer, les.crippen, Leslie Bassman, lester, Les Turner, Les Walton, Le Yammy, Lilly, Lindy, linux.curious, Linux Exposer, linux.freak.detector, Lisa Cottmann, Lisa Shavas, llanalott, Lois Hunt, Long, long_tong_ling, luisortizhome, Lukumi Babalu Aye, Luna Lane, M0she, Magnus Boyle, Major Mynor, Manny, Mario Fermin,, McSwain, mista twista, Mogumbo, Mooshoo Bong Singh, Morris Tripper, Moses, Moshe Goldfarb , mr.macfeelme, Ms Pixee Dust, mycarisfast, narrows_whitefish, nate_mcspook, Navid Shakibapour, Ofeelya Pratt, oh.bama.da.rack, okto_pussy, One Shot. One Kill,, organ.creep, OSS KDE User, Paddy McCrockett, Paddy McCrockett, Paris Marriot, Patricia, Patrick Finney, Patrick Landrum, Patty LeGrange, patty pippins, Patty Poppins, Paul Wannamaker, percy samson, Peter Gluckman, Peter Kohlmann, Peter Kränkwonov, peter.traphagen, Phil, Phillip Cornwall, Philo P. Shagnasty, phoung, phoung quoak, pickle_pete, Piss Clam, Polly Ester, Poopy Pants McGee, pus.boy99, pyles69, Quimby, Quinton Magee, Quizno Backer, Ratter, Ray Schitzmepantz, Reporter, Rich, Richard P. Johnson, Richie, Richie O'Toole, Richie Spano, Rick Young , right.wanger, Robert Strunk, Rod, rodolfo.garcia44, Roland Whitson, rothstein_ivan, Roy_Pestowitz, Roy.Schakemetitz, Roy.Schavedmenutz, Roy.Schavesmewankz, Roy.Schitzowitz, roy.shysterwitz, roys.testicles, roy.the.spam.king, RP Modell, RyanMcCoskrie, ryebra, Sally Vadi, Sammy, Sammy Whalen, Sandeep Kumar, Saul Goldblatt, schavemetitz, Schestertitz, schestowitz, schestowizzle, schisterwitz, schitzmepantz, Schlomo Rabinowitz, Schlomo Smykowski, Sean, Sean Fitzhenry, Sean Macpherson, sewer_clown, Sewer Rat, Sharon Cackle, Sharon Hubbasland, Shelly K., Sherlock Holmes, simian.knucklescraper, Simon, Simon Lewis, simply.lisa, Singer, sista sledgehammer, slacker.mcspritze, Spammy_Davis, spanny_davis, Stefan Karstensen, Stephanie, Stephanie Mannerz, Stephan Simonsen, Stephen, Stephen Olsen, Stephen Townshend, StinkPot, stomach.pump, SuckyB, Sue, sue quinterra, sully1999, SunnyB, Susan, Susan Bladder, Susan Lapinski, Susan Wong, suzie.linux, Suzie Wong, Suzi Wong, Swampee, swing.cock, sylvano12tegriorgriach, Ted Bennington, Terri Sorensen, Terry Porter, The Beaver, The Linux Destroyer, Thorsten, Thorsten Thigpen, Throckmorton E. Pouch, Timmy Luncford , Toby Rastus Roosovelt III, toe.mein, Tomas Bicsak, tomas.bozak, Tomas Dunton, Tomas Lucatorto, Tori, Tori Wassermann, Torre Stanslaand, Trace Dennison, Tracee, Traci, traci.alicock, traci.manicotti, traci.pusey, Traci Spritzendrainer, trailerpark, Trina Swallows, Trolly, Trudi Simpkins, Tryxie Lustern, Ubuntu Sucks, Uday Shankar, udayshankar29, victimizedb, victimizedbyms, Vince Fontain, Vladimir Yepifano, Walter Bubniak, Wang Mycock, Wasser, Waterskidoo, wendy, Wendy Duzz, Wendy Toiletwater, Whizzer, Wilbur J, willy watkins jr, Willy Wong, wiltons_pypes, Winnie Septos, wizard.shot, wm_walsh, Wobbles, wylbur.horseman, Yanick Schmuley and zyklon_C.
Plus many, many, many more.